The best thing about my new apartment is, hands down, the proximity to gay bars. Also, I am not at all saddened by the propensity of gay men to buy me drinks, call me "gorgeous", and laugh at my jokes... And empathize with my newly recognized aging.
HA HA! Look at the new "fine lines" on my forehead! And you say "OY!" when you get out of bed in the morning too? And how about those younguns nowadays?! And what do you do to git those kids off your lawn?
I think I might never leave.