Wow. Updating your resume and portfolio because even though you are full-time employed, and have enough work to keep you busy, you's is askeered! Because the uber-rich don't seem to want to keep spending money on enormous, frivolous, ridiculous things that keep girls who-draw-lines in dental insurance and webhosting.

But anyway! On to other news!

• My exasperating mother has a new boob! And, according to her, it has a prosthetic penis for a nipple!

• Words I don't ever want to hear my mother say: 1 - penis, 2 - nipple.

• I received a traffic infraction in the mail yesterday, complete with photographs... Of me MAKING A LEGAL RIGHT TURN. Seattle Municipal Court, you will be hearing from my attorney! Or just a very indignant me. Which is worse than my attorney! Because, did you read the indignant part? INDIGNANT!!

And I'm sure some other stuff happened while I was gluing pictures to card stock and bugging my old boss for a vaguely written recommendation; but I don't know what those things were. But I'm sure they were faaaabulous.